I had an excellent 3 day weekend. Well, it was technically 3 1/2 days after another half day. Either way, I enjoyed every second of it. Normally my weekend is composed of rigorous homework, a busy schedule, and lack of sleep. Instead, after totally rocking my finals (I don't mean to brag, I was simply elated), I experienced 84 hours of fun! But, it felt like 228. Ask me, how did I arrive at that number? I accidentally miscalculated it the first time on my computer, and then completely didn't find that number odd until a friend pointed out my mistake. Oops!Anyway, I am perfectly content with my finals and final grades for the second trimester. I find it very interesting how I actually stressed less this term, yet achieved a significantly higher GPA. How could this be possible? Is it true that I excel better when I not under so much pressure or when I maintain a relatively laid-back attitude towards my grades? Is it possible that not being so worried about my grades could result in better grades?
BUT....... that was before I had the dream.* Yes, I had another nightmare (see "Dream" post). I misread my GPA. I know it's like the end of the world! But it gets worse. When looked at from the vantage point of an overachiever, analytical, perfectionist, a 4.0 is like doomsday. Instead of the 4.378 I actually received, I misread it and it was a 4.0378. In my dream, I do recall feeling a terrible heap of dread and shame. It's as if I fell short of the quota mark. Like I tried so hard for nothing.
I always beat myself up like this. My mom says she doesn't know where it's coming from. It's not like my parents thrive on my super grades. They simply desire for me to try my best. Which is what I do. But I always feel like I can do better. Unfortunately, my overwhelming schedule doesn't calculate time for extra-credit or more studying. I don't even know why I've been dwelling on these things lately. If God has taught me anything this year it's that grades don't really matter, when focusing on Him (see "A New Perspective").
It's all about the truth. You see, I was telling myself lies when I felt like a failure (I know it seems ridiculous) in my dream of a 4.0! In reality, I have a perfect GPA. I am aware that it's possible to get a 5.0 with AP classes and A+'s. But even if I got a 3.0, the world wouldn't suddenly fall out from underneath me. I would still be living, and as long as have learned the most important lesson you can ever learn in this life - the Gospel and God's plan for salvation through Jesus Christ - then the rest is useless. Do you know what the truth is? It's Jesus Christ. And any lie you encounter in the world is from Satan. He's the father of lies (John 8:44)!
~Lord, I don't ever want to exchange your truth for lies of the world. Telling myself a 4.0 GPA is a lie. It's not the truth, and I don't ever want to be held captive by lies.
*Note: Notice how I completely changed the tone of my writing and my entire perspective from just one dream (I'm not purposely trying to be contradictory or confusing). It's amazing how lies can do that. They warp reality and can completely change your mood! That's one reason we each need God so much. He gives us truth. I'm not talking about the definition of truth as "void of lies" or "reality." I'm referring to THE truth - Jesus Christ. He is truth. And His word is the Book of Truth (Daniel 10:21). My mom mentioned an amazing verse the other night: God's Word never returns void!
BUT....... that was before I had the dream.* Yes, I had another nightmare (see "Dream" post). I misread my GPA. I know it's like the end of the world! But it gets worse. When looked at from the vantage point of an overachiever, analytical, perfectionist, a 4.0 is like doomsday. Instead of the 4.378 I actually received, I misread it and it was a 4.0378. In my dream, I do recall feeling a terrible heap of dread and shame. It's as if I fell short of the quota mark. Like I tried so hard for nothing.
I always beat myself up like this. My mom says she doesn't know where it's coming from. It's not like my parents thrive on my super grades. They simply desire for me to try my best. Which is what I do. But I always feel like I can do better. Unfortunately, my overwhelming schedule doesn't calculate time for extra-credit or more studying. I don't even know why I've been dwelling on these things lately. If God has taught me anything this year it's that grades don't really matter, when focusing on Him (see "A New Perspective").
It's all about the truth. You see, I was telling myself lies when I felt like a failure (I know it seems ridiculous) in my dream of a 4.0! In reality, I have a perfect GPA. I am aware that it's possible to get a 5.0 with AP classes and A+'s. But even if I got a 3.0, the world wouldn't suddenly fall out from underneath me. I would still be living, and as long as have learned the most important lesson you can ever learn in this life - the Gospel and God's plan for salvation through Jesus Christ - then the rest is useless. Do you know what the truth is? It's Jesus Christ. And any lie you encounter in the world is from Satan. He's the father of lies (John 8:44)!
Romans 1:25 (NIV)
"They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator—who is forever praised. Amen."
~Lord, I don't ever want to exchange your truth for lies of the world. Telling myself a 4.0 GPA is a lie. It's not the truth, and I don't ever want to be held captive by lies.
John 8:32 (NIV)
"Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."
-A+ picture from Google.*Note: Notice how I completely changed the tone of my writing and my entire perspective from just one dream (I'm not purposely trying to be contradictory or confusing). It's amazing how lies can do that. They warp reality and can completely change your mood! That's one reason we each need God so much. He gives us truth. I'm not talking about the definition of truth as "void of lies" or "reality." I'm referring to THE truth - Jesus Christ. He is truth. And His word is the Book of Truth (Daniel 10:21). My mom mentioned an amazing verse the other night: God's Word never returns void!
Isaiah 55:11 (NIV)
"so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it."
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